(All of) The Fault in Our Stars – John Green

*** I just want to quickly mention that a few months back, I had planned to quit my blog as soon as I had uploaded all of my previously written posts. Since then, I have come to the conclusion that my blog was not the underlying factor in my stress and so I have decided to keep up my blog for now.

That’s all I got, okay?

“Okay,” he said after forever. “Maybe okay will be our always.” (page 73)

Title: The Fault in Our Stars
Written by: John Green
Genre: Romance
Publisher: The Penguin Group
Publication Date: 2012
Paperback: 318 pages

Hazel Grace is a grenade. A girl cursed with cancer, death, and a book without a proper end. Then she meets August Waters: cancer survivor and living metaphor. What follows, is a whirlwind of pain, love, grief, and hope that ends with a terminally ill girl becoming more alive than the rest of the world.

I really want to hate this book.

I’ve never read a book that failed all of my expectations as much as The Fault in our Stars has.

I expected to hate this book.

I expected to quit reading it after a few chapters.

I expected (and really, really want) to write a scathing review for it.

I expected to question my best friend’s sanity (because she loves this story).

But I don’t.

And I hate it.

Dang you, John Green for making me enjoy an angsty teen romance book!

CYJG

I connected with the main character, Hazel Grace, in so many ways it felt as if the book were written about me.

Except I’ve never had cancer –

or a boyfriend.

But that’s beside the point.

If John Green had interviewed me then written his book, the amount of connection I had with Hazel would have made sense.

However,

Now that I’ve let myself gush about how much I loved this book …

IT’S RANT TIME!

#1. Hazel’s parents are horrible parents – but only when it’s plot necessary.

Hazel has known August for a whole five minutes when he asks her over to his house.

Fine, whatever. He’s just asking.

Hazel asks her mom if she can go over to his house

Fine, whatever. She’s just asking.

Hazel’s mom says yes.

“Hey mom, can I go over to this Hot-Dude-With-An-Unlit-Cigarette-In-His-Mouth-Who-I Meet-Five-Minute-Ago’s house? I promise I’ll be home at a decent time.”

“Oh sure sweetie, have fun.”

My mom and dad would do a background check on the boy before letting me shake his hand.

Um… not sure what happened there, because for the rest of the book Hazel’s parents are super protective of her. Not in a bad way, but in a My-Child-Has-Cancer-And-Might-Die-Any-Day-So-I-Need-To-Be-With-Her-As-Much-As-Possible protection.

But then, later in the book, Hazel’s mom lets her and August go off (alone) on a date and the next day to another place by themselves (not saying where for plot reasons).

And the mom just does her own thing.

CONCLUSION: parenting fail.

#2. Underage drinking.

Because what better things are there to do when you’re sixteen and dying of cancer?

#3. They don’t (ahem) make love but they do sleep (in just their underwear) with each other.

Not even sure how to rant about this.

WHY

JUST WHY

I didn’t need to read about that.

#4. According to this book: life is a waste of time and you should stop reading this review and die while you still can.

Life is beautiful.

Every minute is a gift we have been given and those are gifts you can never exchange or get back.

(Don’t waste your gifts on this book)

#5. WE HAVE ANOTHER ENDLESS BOOK!

Why is it that the Neverending Story has a better ending than half the books I’ve read this year?

Oh look, another book where the author was too lazy to wrap up all the plotlines.

Okay fine, so they were all wrapped up – but most of them were wrapped up with:

“Sorry, kid. Your life’s terrible and you don’t get what you want.”

And as I’ve mentioned before: I read to escape reality – not to be hit in the face with depressing book endings.

*looking at John Green* AHEM!

The Fault in Our Stars is a well written, deeply real book but the word “fault” was not included in the title for nothing. There are major moral problems with this story, so I will only recommend it for high schoolers and/or adults who are (for some strange reason) fans of John Green or (for an equally strange reason) romance genre buffs.

For More Information about the Book and Author Click: HERE

Age Range: 16 (or 17) and up

Cautions – *Contains Slight Spoilers* 

Violence: Hazel attacks the author (and I don’t mean John Green – which, at certain points in this book, was something I’d like to have done). Isaac wrecks August’s basement – he literally destroys everything in the basement. Hazel wants to stab people and be stabbed. Hazel and August read a book and watch a movie with lots of dead people/bodies.

Sensuality: Hazel and August sleep with either other while only in underwear – they sleep together several times. Balls and nuts are mentioned. August calls Hazel sexy. Several couples kiss. Isaac’s girlfriend breaks up with him. Gus jokes about sending Isaac a porn story. Isaac gropes his girlfriend. Several mentions of “boobs”. A reference to sodomy. Gus tries to watch a movie in his basement alone with Hazel. A long talk/several mentions about how August is a virgin.

Profanity: B***s**t, a**, d**n, s**t, f**k, b***h, s**k, p**s, s**t, b*****d, dumb-butt, hell, s**t and God’s name is taken in vain.

Other(drugs/alcohol): A ton of talk about death and the afterlife. Everyone is depressed. A lot of people have/die of cancer. A boy gets his eye removed. August had his leg amputated. A lot of puking and mentions of vomit. Hazel goes with a complete stranger to his home(with permission from her mom). Smoking cigarettes (kind-of). Hazel and August drink champagne. Hazel, August, and Isaac throw eggs at someone’s car. Little kids play on bone statues. Evolution, being anti-Columbus, herpes, pot, having a period, bulimia, prostitution, divorce, and pedophiles are mentioned.

Personal Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
Cleanness Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

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